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Fall 2000 - RAZOR Magazine Premiere Issue
Is it just me, or has the entire world gone mad?
I have these 2 female friends. Not to protect the innocent, but rather
to protect my own ass, I shall call them Thelma and Louise. Recently,
I stopped by Thelma's house to pick her up for a night on the town with
the crew. I waited in her living room as she dressed and perused the
reading material on her coffee table. I settled into the one with Ms.
Klum on the cover and immediately found myself immersed in the Better
Orgasms: Things Your Man Needs to Know article. Here, at my fingertips,
were 10 ways that I could better please a woman. After reading them
carefully, I was pretty certain that throughout my life I had successfully
accomplished 3 of them (hey, batting .300 in baseball would earn me
5 mil a year in this day and age). I was also fairly sure that there
were 4 that were physically impossible unless you were a midget or double
jointed, and the other 3 would have required a trip to Home Depot and
some heavy lifting.
When Thelma came out of her bedroom I asked her what she thought of
the article. "Please", she said, "Don't get me started.
According to those rags, the missionary position went out of vogue during
the Reagan administration. Today, it's not good sex unless you have
the goddamn Grucci Brothers shooting fireworks off in your bedroom while
the Philadelphia friggin Philharmonic blasts The Ride of the Valkyries."
Have I mentioned that Thelma hasn't dated in a year?
It was the beginning of a long night which got longer when Louise cornered
me at the bar and started lamenting about the ozone layer. Apparently
the Antarctic hole had spread to over 11 million square miles and Louise
was going to, at least for that night, hold me responsible. She turned
belligerent when I coolly mentioned that I had discarded all of my chlorofluorocarbons
in 1987, but that I was willing to lay odds that the crap spiking her
hair straight up had been pumped from an aerosol can. Have I mentioned
that Thelma owns 3 cats? Driving home that night, I couldn't help but
think of how pessimistic Thelma and Louise had become. The next morning,
before they arrived, I left them both a voice mail at their places of
work. It was a simple, one sentence message.
"Play life, or let life play you."
And that, in so many words, is the philosophy of RAZOR Magazine. We're
not about a lifestyle, we're about life. You've heard the expression
that everything worth doing in life is worth doing twice? Well, we at
RAZOR believe that anything that gets your heart thumping, adrenaline
rushing and blood flowing...anything that gets your psychological rocks
off, is worth doing ad infinitum.
Each issue will bring you the latest in cutting edge entertainment.
From rising talent to breakout musicians to the latest in fashion and
health trends, we'll have you covered. Hell, we may even throw in some
realistic sex tips from time to time. Steeped with energy, we're striving
to go farther, faster and harder than the average publication. To paraphrase
the immortal Spinal Tap, this magazine goes to 11.
So leave your inhibitions at the door, open your mind and step inside.
We welcome all feedback, positive or negative. Not too negative though,
or I'm going to give your address to both Thelma AND Louise.
Enjoy the Issue,
Richard Botto,
Editor in Chief / CEO of RAZOR Magazine - The Definitive Men's Lifestyle Magazine
www.razormagazine.com
